Month One

It wasn't pretty but we did it baby boy. We survived your first month. The first week of your life we spent in a blissed out state together and you were such a calm baby and rarely cried. Our pediatrician told us you were an easy baby and we smiled in agreement. Then things changed. You spent almost all your awake time crying. You only slept hard when someone was holding you and if they laid you down you awoke within ten minutes. You spit up a lot. A lot. And your body writhed in pain when you did. I just knew something was wrong with you but couldn't find the culprit and drove myself into depression looking for answers and coming up empty handed. I blamed myself, my overabundant supply of milk, my disappearing supply of milk, my stress. It took me to a dark place. At your one month appointment today you were diagnosed with acid reflux. It breaks my heart to know that your pain and screaming was not from being colic or a fussy baby but from the excruciating pain your esophagus was experiencing. You were prescribed medicine and I'm hopeful it will work. We came home from the appointment and I already felt lighter. I had an answer that fit everything I was worried about. The barrier that was blocking me from fully connecting with you was suddenly removed and I fell more in love with you instantly. We have more hurdles to go as you are also going to be tested for lactose intolerance due to some other symptoms but I am no longer clouded. I'm sorry I spent your first month not understanding you or your pain but I'm looking forward to making up that time now. I love you my sweet son. You truly have made my life complete.

One month stats:

-10 pounds 9 ounces- 74%
-23 inches long - 93%
-You are strong! You pretty much came out of the womb holding your head up. Every Dr. and nurse comments on your strength.
-You love the double ceiling fan at Oma's house.
-You sleep best when it is dark so during the day we have to put part of the blanket over your face.
-You are quite the little sneezer.
-You love to eat and nursing you was perfect from the beginning.
-Your sister adores you and is always asking to hold you.
-You sleep best on your side and now we know why with your reflux.
-I've seen a few smiles but you really flash the grins for Oma.
-You suck on your hands and fingers when you are getting hungry.
-Your longest stretch of sleep was 3.5 hours. Most of the time in the night you are down 8:30-12, then back up at 2:30, 4:30 and Rivers usually wakes us both up at 6. I'm looking forward to more sleep.
-You are already reaching the bottom of length for 0-3 months but aren't filling them out much.