Month 6

   My little cowboy. 6 months. 6 long and short months. When I first laid eyes on you on that warm February day, I thought my heart could never feel fuller. But in 6 months it has only grown and expanded to levels I never knew possible. You are a bright and reliable light in our lives. You love freely and fully and forgive just the same. You are patient and easygoing. You are strong. You are funny. You are the little boy of my dreams.

Stats:

19 lbs (80%) 29.5" (off charts)

You are a rolling machine.

You are also a planking machine.

You will be crawling in no time.

You still love your jumper but only if everyone is in your line of vision. I have snuck out of the room to get ready too many times and you are on to me.

You have survived the torture of crying it out. I honestly got to the point where my brain was telling me I was going to die from lack of sleep. I have never experienced this level of exhaustion. You cried 30 min for the first nap, 35 for the afternoon and 35 for the night. That was 3 days ago and since then I haven't heard you at all! That might have more to do with me turning the volume off on the monitor but hooray! I am finally getting some quality sleep and you still love me.

Twice this month you have fussed when I tried to rock you to sleep and out of options I laid you down in your crib only for you to quietly fall asleep on your own. 

You are really attached to momma and my right arm is getting really buff toting you around.

You have had carrots, apples and peas. You are getting better about swallowing but so far aren't crazy about any of it.

After various tests with the allergist it has been determined that you have no food allergies but are intolerant to dairy, soy, mold, pollen, cats and dogs. So relieved you will grow out of your dairy and soy sensitivity.

You find potty training hilarious and laugh hysterically when your sister is in tears. Thanks for the levity you bring to those situations.

Just in the last few days you have gotten much better at sitting up on your own.

We just adore you, Buddy Gus!

Month 5

  Oh my oh my, you are 5 months my little guy. I can't believe how long and short it has been. It feels long in that I feel I have known you all my life and short in that it feels like yesterday that I first saw your face. I am so completely smitten with you, it is ridiculous. You are a joyful child. 90% of the pictures I have of you show the huge smile that is always on your face. Even while you are in the depths of some serious teething, you continue to grace us with huge grins.

-18 lbs and 27.5 inches long

-Mostly in 6-12 or 9-12 month clothing, which I expected you to be in for cooler months so you don't have much to wear right now. 

-I bought you some hippy dippy teething necklace and while I have my doubts that it is working, I am too scared to remove it for fear of what it might bring on

-You still aren't much for rolling but you will boot scoot like it's nobody's business. If I leave you on a blanket for a minute, you are inevitably off it and across the room by the time I return

-You LOVE your sister. Oh my goodness, you already find her so hilarious. You are very patient with her when she spends hours upon hours rubbing your fuzzy bird hair.

-I think it might be safe to say you are becoming a Momma's Boy. You definitely search me out in a crowd of people and cry the second I leave the room

-We are still having late night dates, or early morning. Sometimes they are at 3:30 or 4 which is alright by me, but other times they are at 12:30 and again at 4, which isn't so alright with me. Last night you slept until 6 (!!!!) which is directly correlated to us taking you to a late dinner. There is a pattern here, every time you have slept through the night except once, you have been out past 8 with us.

-Your fingers must taste real nice. They are in your mouth all day long. You gag yourself at least once a day because they are so far down your throat. You are a slobbery mess all the time.

-You love to be sung to. It is quite the confidence booster for me when you fuss and then become calm and happy when I sing.

-You are the easiest traveler. I can take you out for errands, bring you home for 5 minutes and put you right back in the car seat for more adventures without hearing a peep.

-I took you on a run for the first time a few weeks ago and you literally smiled at me the whole time. T'was the happiest run of my life.

-You have impeccable comedic timing already. We were outside reading books with your sister when she picked out a princess book to read. You started blowing raspberries and toot noises immediately, sharing your opinion of princess books with us.

-More people are starting to confess that you look like my side of the family. I think it is becoming more apparent everyday.

-Your thighs are very close to no longer fitting in the Bumbo but that's alright as you are getting very close to sitting up on your own.

-I think you might be a drummer at heart. Every time you hear a beat you get really still listening and then start to smile really big.

-Your cheeks are really ticklish and I love to kiss them and hear your sweet giggle.

-You are definitely ready to start eating as you watch me longingly while I shove every bite into my mouth.

-We had an appointment with the allergist and will be doing a blood, stool and back prick test. This brings me so much relief to know we will have more definitive answers as to what bothers you so.

Month Four

I'm definitely a little late in posting this but I wanted to get it down before you turned five months and the two started to blur together. I cannot believe you are four months old already. I cannot believe how much you have grown and changed before my very eyes. I look at pictures of you as a newborn and it feels so long ago and so foreign. I was so distraught by your digestive issues that I wasn't really paying attention to YOU and the beautiful creature you are. I am sorry for that. It is something I will never be able to change but I can tell you now I wake up everyday in awe of you and the beautiful and patient child you are. You may be one addition to our family but you have blessed our lives an immeasurable amount.

16 lbs 5 oz 27.25"

You love to hold hands, especially when you are drinking your bottle. You fidget and squirm until you get someone's hand and then you sit still and quietly drink.

You eat, play, sleep in 3 hr rounds. Isn't that the Babywise method? You seemed to have put yourself on this rhythm with no help from me.

We have been adding rice cereal to bottle per the pediatrician's recommendation to help you sleep longer. I am constantly doing things I said I would never do as a mother, like introducing solids before 6 months and putting cereal in a bottle. But boy, I'm getting desperate for more sleep and the formula you are on is made of nothing so you get hungry all the time.

It has been decided that you probably have more allergies. More digestive, skin and respiratory. We will be seeing an allergist at the end of July for testing. 

As always, smiling nonstop. You are the smiliest thing I have ever seen.

You are already getting hard to rock to sleep. You squirm and rub your face and can't seem to settle and maul the face of whoever is holding you.

Your bib, hands or pacifier are in your mouth at all times. You are a slobbery mess

You watch mommy's every move and start crying when I leave the room.

You are watching sister and find her hilarious.

You giggle occassionally and it is the best thing ever 

You are wearing 9 month pjs because you are so long. 

Your hair is growing like weeds

You are growing like a weed

You are a great traveller

You are becoming a hip rider but your head is still too heavy for you sometimes

You love your bumbo and swing the most 

You actually like Sophie the Giraffe

We cannot wait to watch you continue to grow and look forward to the continued joy you have added to our lives. We love you Gussy!

A Babe is Born

I sat in the doctor's office at almost 40 weeks and stared at the calendar on the wall while discussing induction dates. Dr. K told me she would induce me anyday after 40 weeks and while I wanted to  fight induction this go around, I also wanted this baby to be born in February and not March. It was very silly but I think I had so long told people I was due in February that I mentally could not picture having him in March. I chose Wednesday February 27th, for induction, in case it took over 24 hours and then he would still have a February birthday. I got a call from the doctor's office the next day saying the hospital had no availability of Wednesday so I moved it to Tuesday. There it was. The end of my pregnancy was in sight. Part of me was holding out hope that the full moon on February 25th would send me into labor. Silly wives tales.

The full moon in front of our house as I showered and Dave let the dog out.

I wasn't sleeping well at night and so at 2 am on February 25th I found myself laying wide awake in bed fretting over my decision to be induced. Maybe I should let him come in March if that is what he wants. Could I handle the mental anguish of maybe waiting up to another week for delivery? I could tell he was getting big, could I deliver an even larger baby? I started to think about a sermon I had heard in church a few weeks prior about the sin of worrying. I prayed to God to remove my worries and fears and placed my trust in Him. I awoke again at 5:30 am and on my walk to the restroom, just as my feet moved from carpet in our bedroom to tile in our bathroom - GUSH. I could hear Rivers wake up at that exact moment and I was flooded with relief. This was exactly the start of delivery I had hoped for. Water breaking, a clear sign labor was imminent, Rivers well rested and not jostled in the middle of the night, an early morning start to delivery so that everyone was operating on a night of rest, and the cold that had been plaguing our family for weeks suddenly was not present. God is so good. I walked out of our bedroom to find Dave who was now rocking a drowsy Rivers and said "Babe", to which he shushed me because he was trying to get Rivers back to sleep, "Babe" I started again "my water broke." I watched as he immediately came to life and reached for his cell phone to call his parents. I told him there was no real rush and that I was going to shower.

By 6:10 am we were in the car and driving to his parents house to drop off Rivers. I started to feel some mild discomfort in the car but for the most part it felt so surreal that today was the day. We dropped Rivers off and drove the remaining distance to the hospital. I had wanted to avoid an epidural this go around to test my own strength but as our feet crossed the threshold to Memorial Hospital, I turned to Dave and stated that I was getting the epidural. We waited for some time to be lead to delivery and at this point the contractions were starting to come on. It was pretty clear at this point I was going to be experiencing back labor.

When we arrived in the delivery wing we were met with a sassy nurse who looked at me and said "Can I help you?" It makes me laugh to recall it even now. I told her my waters had broken and she sighed and told me I was just going to have to wait because they were in the middle of a shift change. Sure. I'll wait here in labor. I'm sorry for the inconvenience. She told us which room we could head to and 15 minutes later someone delivered a gown. I did my quick change and we waited for what seemed like an hour until my angelic nurse Amy walked in. Immediately I was at ease and I knew in that moment how fortunate I was to have her. She checked me and by this point I was at a 4. My mom arrived soon after and we all settled in while the contractions started building. The back labor was pretty miserable and the only position I found bearable was to sit up Indian style with my legs folded while both Dave and my mom pushed on my back during contractions. The contractions continued to build and I was asking for the epidural but the anesthesiologist was booked for two c-sections so I had a lot of time to wait. My back started to get tired from sitting up and my arms as well but I couldn't move positions because anything else made the contractions too unbearable. I finally caved and asked Amy for Fentanyl. I had wussed out with Rivers and gotten this drug and found it only provided 10 minutes of relief. I really wanted to avoid it this go around as it does affect the baby but by this point 10 minutes of relief sounded amazing. I got the Fentanyl and felt high for about 30 minutes after. It was just the relief I needed while waiting for the epidural which didn't end up coming for another hour. The anesthesiologist walked in with a beam of light behind him. With Rivers my epidural was way too strong and I couldn't walk for 8 hours after. This go around was completely different. It was the epidural of my dreams. I couldn't feel the pain of contractions but could still move my legs and felt pressure when it came time to push. As the epidural kicked in I tried to take a little nap but the excitement of meeting my son prohibited this and I kept waking up to chat with my mom or Dave. I was progressing pretty regularly ever hour and by 1 pm I was pretty much ready to go despite a little bit of the bag of waters remaining and waiting on my doctor who was busy in another procedure off sight. By the time the doctor arrived what was left of my waters was gone and it was time to go. Dave bragged to the doctor, who is a client of his, that I got Rivers out in three pushes and challenged me to do the same with this baby. As soon as I started pushing it became clear why I had such bad back labor as August was sunny side up. Somewhere around the second push I heard them say something about two cords and in my stupor I thought Wow, he has two umbilical cords! Instead, the cord was wrapped around his neck twice but miraculously he tolerated labor very well and his heart rate was not affected. Sure enough, on the third set of pushes, buddy boy was out. I was immediately taken with how much he reminded me of Rivers. He seemed so tiny to me but all the nurses and the doctor were talking about what a big baby he was. They placed him on the scale and I was so surprised to hear my predicted baby of 7.5 lbs was actually 8 pounds 11 ounces and 21.25 inches long. I suddenly understood why my belly had been so large. August latched on perfectly soon after and we were immediate friends. It was the delivery I had dreamed of and prayed for and it had just been realized. I was on Cloud 9.

Leaving for the hospital.

Dropping Rivers off at Moggy and Tampa's house.

Momma rubbing my back while contractions were still bearable. 

This is definitely post epidural when I could finally sit back. Homegirl be feeling GOOD.

So blessed to have my Momma there for the delivery.

May I Introduce you to someone?

August Gregory Bynum
Born February 25, 2013 at 2:51 pm
8 pounds 11 ounces

More of a story to come.

Modern Lumberjack Nursery

  He may not have a name but at least this baby has a nursery. Dave likes to call it Modern Lumberjack. I have to admit there were moments when I was worried it was becoming a little too hodge-podge but I think in the end it came together just as I was hoping. It is bright and quirky and makes me happy. I made all of the bedding and changing pads this go around along with the curtains and now that I am 37 weeks pregnant I look at them and feel so relieved I sewed them months ago.  I feel that way about the whole room actually. So glad that it is done because I don't feel like doing much. Nesting came early and is long gone. I haven't even finished packing my hospital bag and yet I have this feeling that he will be coming before his due date. Hopefully I can get around to that this weekend.

 

 

Fox lamp (Target: Patch NYC), Changing Pad cover (made by me), Dresser (Ikea Mandal but restained by Dave)

Rug (Urban Outfitters), Curtains (Made by me, Fabric from Ikea), Pouf (Target: Patch NYC), Child rocker (family heirloom)

All critters from Target.

Thrift store needlepoint.

Clockwise: Bear (River Luna), Owl (RiverLuna), Fox Crewel (Vintage from TheOddBin), Native American Painting (Thrifted), Fox (RiverLuna), Three Raccoons (Thrifted), Yosemite Moon picture (from Moggy and Grandpa),  My Roots Lie Here, CA (here), Feather print (RiverLuna).

These still need to be framed and hung: WildLifePrints

Triangle and Stag Pillow (Target: Patch NYC), Native American Pillow (Family heirloom)

Mobile made by me.

Needlepoint seat cushion (Family heirloom). Can you believe all of the blue is needlepoint as well? What dedication. And I have five more of these in different animals. That is A LOT of blue needlepoint!

A Heart that Burns for What it Yearns

My purse currently weighs about 5 pounds more than usual because of this. This is about all that's going on right now. The white bottle next to Tums is a generic form of Xantac. Good times around here. Good acidic times. Baby boy is going to have gobs of hair, right? Ahh, I am seriously so excited about his impending arrival. Just a little over 5 weeks!!!!!

33 weeks.

Sorry baby, if it rains on my walk I cannot help you.

Never looked prouder than when she had a face smeared with Minnie Mouse chapstick.

The outfits are getting real desperate around here.

Pregnancy Stats:

How Far Along: 33 weeks 2 days

Size of baby: Pineapple

Total Weight Gain: 25 lbs

Gender: Boy

Movement: He's been a little more active than usual as of late. His movements are more rolling than kicking now.

Sleep: Does anyone want a dog? Ralpherson has been barking every night in the middle of the night for four days now. My baby hormones are already kicking in and once I'm awake, I am WIDE awake. In summation, sleep has not been good around here. We toss Ralphie outside once he starts but last night I awoke to the sound of coyotes and had a panic attack that Ralphie would be eaten. I was scared for him but not scared enough to get out of bed and let him back in the house. He survived.

Cravings: Nothing. Afraid to eat anything for fear of heartburn.

Best Moment this week: We may have decided on a name. We will not be sharing until his birth but let's suffice to say there is a 99% chance he has a name. And the relief that brings to me is immense! I already feel more bonded with him!

30 weeks 5 days - But Who's Counting?

This picture was taken at 30 weeks and I'm now almost 31. I think my belly has grown a few inches since then, truthfully. I'm part of the February Babies online group and they had this fun game where everyone was to measure their bellies. I measured 36". I remembering measuring a week or two before Rivers arrived and I was 40" so I still have some to gain. I am definitely starting to feel this pregnancy now. My legs feel thicker, it's harder to stand up and I've had a couple nights where I've had to sleep upright due to indigestion (does this mean he'll have hair??!?!) but overall I'm still feeling pretty great. I cannot believe he will be here so soon. We finally finished his nursery, of which I'll post pictures soon, and I love wandering in there and waiting for him. I remember doing the same thing with Rivers. The anticipation is so exciting.

I finally had another ultrasound today and the little man is measuring right on track, 4 days before my due date. He's about 3.5 pounds now and head down ready to party. This is the first ultrasound where he really looks different than Rivers to me. We decided not to spend the money on a 3d this go around so I'm really excited to see his little face and meet him. I think he has fuller lips than Rivers and a larger nose. He's a real cutie.

Pregnancy Stats:

How Far Along: 30.72 weeks

Size of baby: Four navel oranges (Couldn't they have found a singular item more appropriate?)

Total Weight Gain: 22 lbs

Gender: Boy

Movement: I don't know why but I don't feel a lot of his movement. He seems so quiet to me and usually does slow poking movements with only occasional kicks but at every doctor's appointment they comment on how much he's moving.

Sleep: Rivers has been sick and not sleeping well and we all know how that translates. Also, my hormones are kicking in and once I'm awake I'm WIDE-awake and it takes me a while to fall back asleep.

Cravings: Nothing in particular at the moment.

Best Moment this week: Seeing the little man on ultrasound and watching him cover his face with his little hands. It had been so long since I had seen him that I needed this little reminder that he's growing into a real life baby in my belly.

Bummer moment of the week: Finding out my Dr. no longer delivers at the hospital two minutes away from my house and I will instead be delivering at the hospital 30 minutes across town. Which makes me extra nervous since I will not be induced this time and Rivers spent three days in the NICU where I had to wake up in the middle of the night to drive down and feed her. I think this is my first reminder that you simply cannot plan delivery and must go with the flow.

A Very Sweet Surprise.

I woke up Tuesday morning in a funk. I may or may not have gotten into a disagreement the night before with someone and unfortunately my body always takes a long time to recover from such things. I felt naseuous and tired and wished that it had never happened. I knew the day would look up because it was Tuesday and Tuesday is one of my days home with Rivers. She is so much fun right now and so well behaved and I treasure every moment. We had just started our morning routine of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse for her and checking my email for me. I was getting pretty quick and heavy handed with the swiping and deleting on my iphone when I swiped an email and just before I pushed the delete confirmation button a little voice in my head said STOP. The title of the email read "Gilt & The Honest Company Diapers" and the first line of the email was visible and read "Megan, Congratulations!" Over a month ago I had entered a giveaway on Gilt.com for a year's supply of free diapers. I never win such things and usually I hate to even give my email address away but I LOVE these diapers and was feeling risky that day. So when the little voice in my head stopped me, I was half hopeful that I won something and half-concerned that I was now privy to extra spam mail. When I started to read the email, I could not believe that it in fact said "Megan, Congratulations! I'm writing to inform you that your name was selected as the Grand Prize winner in the Gilt and The Honest Company Diaper Sweepstakes. The Grand Prize is a one-year supply of diapers furnished by The Honest Company. This prize has a retail value of $959.40."

............................................Say what?

I was so excited and so conflicted. My emotions wavered between @)*$)*)@($ Yay! to questioning if this was a scam. I kept reassuring myself that I did in fact enter a contest to win such a prize, unlike those  unsolicited emails you get from someone in Africa saying you are entitled to a lot of money. I quickly forwarded all paperwork to Dave to look over and he told me everything looks fine. We will have to pay taxes on the prize since it is over $600 in a value so I had to provide them with some personal information so that they can issue me a 1099. A fraction of me is still concerned I will be subjected to total identity theft within the next few months but at this point the majority of me is excited.

With Rivers I had always paid a little extra for diapers for an eco-friendly biodegradable brand of diapers by Nature Babycare that I really love. We sampled The Honest Company diapers with her and while I found them totally adorable they were more expensive than the Nature Babycare I purchased off of Amazon. I am so beyond excited that I will get to dress another baby's bum in eco-friendly diapers that are so adorable. I cannot wait for my little man to get here to see him in these:

Feeling so very blessed and very grateful! I am usually not the person who wins such things but if there was any prize I would want to win, I think this would be near the top!